Sunday, August 28, 2011

Heat of the Overturning Moment (Slight Return)

Premise:
The Moment of a force is a measure of its tendency to cause a body to rotate about a specific point or axis.

The overturning moment of an object is the moment of energy capable of upsetting the object; that is, the point where it has been subjected to enough disturbance that it ceases to be stable, it overturns, capsizes, collapses, topples or otherwise incurs an unwanted change in its circumstances, possibly resulting in damage and certainly resulting in inconvenience 

Corollary:
Newton's First law (Let's get physical): The velocity of a body remains constant unless the body is acted upon by an external force.

Condtions:

Time- 5:45pm, warm-up lap.
Angle of repose- 0 (level).
Composition of surface- similar to NYSDOT approved subbase
Visibilty- Unlimited.
Speed- 10mph.
Topic of Discussion- Cross tires.

Report:

JRA, you've heard the term, laughed at the stories. "I was just riding along when all the lugs fell off the frame. I'd like a new bike." I still don't believe these folks, but now I do believe the potential for their stories to be true. Why, because of what happened to me. And I have a reliable eyewitness.

One moment chit-chatting about the coolest cross rubber, next a sound, followed by a strange feeling of weightlessness, ending in the too familiar feeling of hitting the ground, grinding body parts into the gravel. WTF?!? Thank goodness my teammate is a pro-level rider, expert at avoiding stupid people pile-ups. But wait? Why did I go down?

After a check of my position, I was nowhere near the brakes.
After a check of the bike, torn hood but everything else spun like butter. No problems.
After a check of the riding surface, nothing. No sticks, pothole, stones, small woodland creatures.
After an interview with the witness, she was unsure why I had decided to practice nose wheelies and could not find any evidence that would have caused the incident.
After all of this, I went home.

Conclusion:
After much forensic analysis, computer modeling, the only rational explanation of the event is Voodoo. I have asked several people if they happen to have a 'JohnO' Voodoo doll? And perhaps, accidentally left it out on the kitchen counter only to have their cat get frisky with it?

After all the denials, I went back to the site, expecting to find  a small satchel containing my hair (where they got that I'll never know), a chicken foot, and some eye of newt. Double, double toil and trouble, fire burn and cauldron bubble...

Now, I am creating some talisman of good Juju to take with me. Any symbolic suggestions to place on my frame would be appreciated.

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